True Value

I have not written in this blog since May, and I do not apologize for that. During the summer I thought about writing an article on women in kendo but dismissed the idea, reasoning that anything I, a man, would write could too easily be misconstrued as condescending, demeaning or ingratiating--none of which would be my intent. The women I know who wield the sword I hold in equal respect to men in all regards, and in some ways more; still, there is sexism as well as racism that infects most human interactions, and avoiding unnecessary offense is the wisest course, in my opinion.

Earlier this Fall I contemplated writing about the value of Summer training--which I still may inscribe. During the summertime it is easy to rationalize taking time off--family vacations, the lethargic self-indulgence of long, warm evenings, and besides--it is physically much more challenging to weigh yourself down with heavy bogu and exercise vigorously. Summer training can be brutal---dojo temperatures in poorly ventilated gymnasiums can climb into the 90's easily--and there are, in my federation, no taikai and so no real reason to be in training other than to train.

But we have a saying, "The Way is in Training", and for those of us who compartmentalize tournaments into a separate place from why we train, the time of year is simply a change of season. They all have value of their own.



But I touched lightly upon what I consider of true value--family considerations. My wife and children do not practice kendo, have little interest in it other than that it is something of value to me. For them, it is a sacrifice to have a husband and father who is away from home two or more nights a week, or all day on a weekend. I am forced by my own choice of Path into missing many precious, irreplacible moments and experiences. I am not there to help the children with their homework problems, to care for my wife or children when they are ill, to take the burden of household chores, attend sports awards banquets, family dinners, school conferences. There are those who would pour ashes and coal on my head for such selfish neglect of family duties, myself among them. The oriental concept of shame is coupled to the occidental concept of guilt.

And so, sometimes, kendo must be consciously set aside to accomodate these precious jewels of highest value. Yesterday there was a big meeting and a godokeiko with many visiting sensei from around the country that I chose not to attend because my son was competing in a cross-country race to try and qualify for a big regional meet. It was far more important for me to be there; I would not have wanted to be anywhere else. Today was a promotion exam for kodansha, higher ranking sensei, and many of my teachers and friends for many, many years were testing. But my wife had some household chores long delayed which required my assistance and my truck, and I also needed to take my older son to the park to run as part of his training, and my younger son to play in the playground.



Tomorrow night I will be at practice, looked at askance or with disdain by some for neglecting important federation functions. There may even be one or two who attempt to physically punish me on the floor for my obduracy. So be it; I make no apologies for considering the one thing over the other, no more than I do for not having written in my blog sooner. All things have their season, and there is a purpose for all earthly things under heaven. That is the true Way.